"A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away...."

“A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away….”

Star Wars was arguably the most influential movie in the history of cinema. George Lucas began with the fundamental viscera of 1950’s-era Saturday afternoon adventure serials, conjured a pleasantly weird outer space setting, and then built his epic story around strangely engaging characters about which the audience could become genuinely concerned. The remarkable voyage he set upon in 1977 still fills theaters today.

In the interest of full disclosure, I really like Star Wars. I don’t own any Yoda underpants, but I do know that the Princess was held in cellblock AA23 and that Han Solo’s Stormtrooper operating number was TK421. I have a fairly ridiculous gun collection, but I would gladly trade the whole shebang for a single operational light saber. If you find that none of this makes any sense, then you have my pity.

Respect of the Jedi

Luke Skywalker and Ben Kenobi stand awestruck in the presence of a burned-out Jawa Sandcrawler. The massive vehicle has been disabled and its occupants inexplicably slaughtered. Luke theorizes that this carnage might be the result of an ambush by the feared Tuscan Raiders, known locally as Sandpeople. Ben counters that the forensic evidence indicates otherwise.

“These are the same Jawas that sold us R2 and 3PO,” Luke says, growing concerned.

“And these blast points, too accurate for Sandpeople. Only Imperial Stormtroopers are so precise,” Ben observes.

“But why would Imperial troops slaughter Jawas? If they traced the droids here, they must have learned who they sold them to and that would lead them back…home!”

For those among you who might not share my insensate enthusiasm for Star Wars, Luke returns home to find Uncle Owen and

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